Really! I do. I know hate is a strong word, but when I wake up in the night (ok, yes, I know it is technically morning, but for me it's night because I should still be sleeping!) and that is what time my Blackberry tells me it is--and it's twice this week that I have seen this hateful time--I get irritated! And come to think of it, I think this happened on the exact same day last week, too! DAMMIT! I like to sleep through the night. It's one of my things.
I didn't used to be a restless sleeper. I NEVER woke in the middle of the night unless one of my kids woke me. When this happens, it makes me want to start to track everything I do. What time I took my vitamins, what time I finished my exercising, what time of the month it is, what the moon phase is, tidal flow...whatever...anything to figure out why and make it STOP! I was so tired when I went to bed, too. John texted me to see if I wanted to talk and while I was going to say yes because I thought he wanted to talk, I said NO! I was so proud of myself for saying no, too. I really didn't want to talk. I wanted to sleep. So, I put that first. And then sleep betrayed me! Bastard!
I tossed and I turned. I tried to sleep in several different positions. I prayed for people and things that were going on. I lay very still...still sleep didn't come. Then, my little boy appeared at my door. Seems he couldn't sleep either. He had his little lantern in hand--seriously, I can't make this shit up--and had turned the bathroom light on in the hall. I had him turn that light off before he climbed into bed with me. I hate light when I am trying to sleep! He climbed into bed with me and we both fell back to sleep. When my evil alarm went off, I was so not ready to get up. I had this whole chocolate banana pudding oatmeal parfait thing that I was making for the kids this morning, so I only snoozed once before hopping briskly from my bed and goading my little boy to do the same...unsuccessfully, I might add.
As I made the parfaits, I kept trying to rouse the little ones to get dressed. My boy got his stuff on and sat at the table. Soon, my little girl appeared in her not happy to see bright lights squint coming down the stairs in her polka dot underwear. Since they were both sitting down to eat, I headed to the shower. As I showered, my boy popped his head in to tell me he didn't like the oatmeal in the parfait. I told him to skip it then. He wanted to have the turkey sausage from dinner last night instead. WHATEVER! Foiled again...good for you stuff--even covered in sugar-free, nonfat chocolate pudding--is still not always the way to go. DAMMIT!
Off to work and into the cold, ice-covered world where I whisper softly, "please don't fall, please don't fall, please don't fall" as I walk cautiously to my car where the kids are waiting for me to wipe out as they peer out the windows. And of course, I get to the car and I have forgotten my laptop. A few swear words, more whispered mantras of not falling and a laptop bag later, we are REALLY ready to leave this time. I make myself a cup of coffee and heat my oatmeal and head back to my office. My sales guy comes by and we chat about this latest challenge at work. Then, my other sales guy comes by to tell me he resigned. I'm happy for him. He is going back to the company he came from. He and I started on the same day here and were office neighbors. I'll still go see his band play and he's not leaving for another few weeks so there's time still to catch up. Now, though, he'll have to call or email me if he wants my doctor-mom advice about the kids :)
Oh, what a day! I would really like to climb back into bed. All I am thinking about is my pillow...the literal one AND figurative one! Hmm...sleep...wishing my workday away already!! Thank GOD it's Friday!