Waking Up Me!

A week ago, I returned from my leadership forum. That morning, I shared the story of my roots. The story of where I came from and where as well as how my identity initially formed. I was a Burke from a strong line of tough Irish folks who made their way to the States in the late 40s and found each other after knowing each other in County Mayo where they grew up. My granny was a Burke by marriage, but she embraced it and each of us who were born into her line through my grampy who gave her his name. She gave up her spirit just before I arrived back in Cleveland last Friday night.  Me, grampy, granny - 1992 I knew she was going to die while I was away, or at least suspected she would as she was not expected to recover after her fall the previous Saturday night. I visited her one last time before I headed to Chicago on Wednesday last week. This past Wednesday, we laid her to rest. We had a mass, shared our hearts and passages from the Bible to encourage those of us left behin...

I am wondering about death. About life. Can life be as rich i f we don't know the sorrow and loss of death? That is where I am right now in my pondering. When someone close to you starts to en ter the end stages of li fe, it makes you think much more about li ving and the time you do have left with the m. Not knowing how long they may have left makes me desire more time wi th them in my life. My grampy died 10 years ago last month; he was one of the most signif icant pe ople in my life since bir th . He had been close to death a number of times from num erous ailments probably precipi tated by his eating, drinking, and smo king habits, but he always seemed to rally . He was a stubborn old man with a will of i ron. Still, his body gave out on him, and death took him . I remember exac tly where I was when the call came from my Uncle Matt t o tell me. I said, "I' m not ready for him to be dead." He asked, "Would you ever be ?" Of course the ans wer was no. ...

Summer for the past three years has been a season of change for me. In 2009, I told my husband I wanted a divorce on May 20th, moved out while our little ones were this his parents in NY for 3 weeks and then moved home for a week before I moved into my new place. Last summer, I reconnected with my first love, had my first post-divorce heartbreak, emptied my proverbial closet and had a very dark time as my boss resigned, everyone at our company took a pay cut, and I had to let three more of my staff go all while trying to climb out of my current abyss of emotion and pain. This year, my ex remarried on Memorial Day weekend, Matthew failed four courses and is considered a sophomore until he passes his summer school which starts Monday, Noah is being bullied by a bunch of boys in my development and it's gotten physical, and then my lease renewal came about and my rent which is already very high is going up another $100, and lastly, my company hasn't recovered to the point where any...

I love the sound of the rain. It comforts and quiets me. I even love the sound of thunder and the bright flashes of lightening. When the wind blows, I love the way it feels pushing against me. I run into it. I let it tenderly caress my skin. As the storm picks up and becomes violent, though, my pleasure turns to concern. I become distraught in the possibilities of what this could be turning into. I let my fears overtake me. The same can be said of when the storms of life start. At first, I may be able to handle it on my own. As the severity of the issues or the number of them multiply, I become overcome. I become overwhelmed. I need to set my sights on something greater than me. After the death of his beloved cousin, John the Baptist, Jesus attempts to go off on his own to pray and grieve privately. Instead, the masses follow after him and call to him. In his care and compassion for them, he joins them instead and heals their sick. As night falls, his disciples plan to send the peopl...