Treat Him to Love

I read this article posted by a friend. She asked what are the 20 things a woman should do for her man. My responses below were learned the hard way through my own 15 year marriage and the 9 years since I chose to divorce. They are not things I say lightly or for part-time living. They are for every day. Every. Day! Even when your man doesn't deserve it, hasn't earned it, give it to him. That is what unconditional love is. The most quoted verses at weddings is from 1 Corinthians 13. It speaks of God's love for us and is meant to teach us how to love like He does. That's what the marriage relationship is to emulate, God as Groom/Husband and us/the church as his Bride.

1. She speaks of him with deference in front of others including her girlfriends. 

2.  She treats him with respect and lifts him up with her words, affirming his character. 

3. She knows no one is perfect and gives him grace for those moments when he falls short for we all do. 

4. She knows that he carries the burdens of so much and appreciates that about him. She tells him how much that means. 

5. She does not withhold sex, but gives herself willingly to him. 

6. She greets him with kisses, and departs just the same. 

7. She takes care of him in the ways he feels the most cared for. 

8. She is his helpmate. She comes alongside him to support him. 

9. She listens when he speaks. 

10. She lets him be the man and care for her rather than standing in her own independence. 

11. She is vulnerable with him. Trusting he cares for her wholly. 

12. She doesn’t seek attention of other men to boost her self esteem.

13. She prays for him and with him. 

14. When he is not at his best, she listens and speaks truth to him. She lifts him up. 

15. When he can’t see the way forward, she joins him in carrying the burden and seeking the next step and the next...

16. She pitches in. Financially, with the home, the kids, the plans. 

17. She knows she is his partner. Not his better. They are both bringing their gifts to the relationship and using them to benefit the whole. 

18. She doesn’t make lists of how much more she is doing or the things he isn’t. She recognizes what each of them does well and how they can make it work. 

19. She opens the lines of communication knowing that he doesn’t read minds. 

20. She doesn’t try to change him. She chose him as he is/was and continues to find the good in him, counting those things as blessings.