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Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Learning to Love Yourself...Right Now!

On Sunday, I met ML up at this great microbrewery called Fatheads. I am not much of a micro-brewed beer kind of girl, but I did actually find one I liked called Goggle Fogger Hefeweizen. This guy that ML has been hot to get to know again (they were good friends back in their high school days) has been back in her life for a few months, but now he's actually interacting regularly with her. Well, he texted and said that if we were up at the bar still, he'd come up and meet us. The first thing ML says is that she's too fat, too frumpy, too...fill in the blank...and he isn't going to like her. So, reality check, ladies...if he doesn't like you just as you are, do you really want him?! Hopefully your answer was NO! Anyway, he came up and told us all about him--her sister, me and ML--because he wants us to know him so he can be a part of her life. Hello?!...MELT! Who doesn't want to hear that?!

We all have "fat days" no matter how big or small we are. Elvis Durand and his morning show crew were talking about this one morning when I was heading into work and I totally agree. It could be your monthly cycle, you ate too much salt, ate a bunch of crap....whatever the mental or physical issue is, it's your momentary (or not so momentary) reality! The mental fat days are much harder on us than the physical. The mental part can fuel the fire and become a cycle where we beat ourselves up, belittle ourselves, and feed the cycle that keeps us looking at what's "wrong" with us instead of loving ourselves just as we are. I asked ML to tell me 10 things about herself that were positive. She could only find 2 and they were both how she was a great friend...I can find 10--and not just about what a great friend she is!

A woman on SparkPeople.com who goes by ~Indygirl had this to say in a blog today and I love it!
Tips to love your body now:

1. Don’t let others be your mirror unless they are a positive one.
2. Find what you like about your body and play it up.
3. Spend time admiring things about yourself in the mirror and in pictures.
4. Do things that make you feel beautiful.
5. Protect yourself from toxic people who belittle your beauty.
6. Avoid comparing bodies.
7. Relearn to love yourself.
8. Participate in things that make you feel good about your body.
9. Discover your style and appreciate it.
10. If you can’t find yourself, reinvent yourself.


Just like you learned to hate your body, you can learn to love it again. Personally, I got a tattoo on my right shoulder of some Victorian flowers that signify that I will no longer wait to live--life is happening now, not 10 pounds from now. It reminds me to love what I have and move on in freedom, stopping to smell the flowers along the way.

Now, here's my Top 10 things I love about myself:
1. I love with all my heart.
2. I love that I am not afraid to tell someone how amazing they are.
3. I love the shape of my shoulders from the pushups and upper body exercises I do.
4. I love the musculature of my calves which remind me I am a runner.
5. I love my sassy attitude.
6. I love to smile and to laugh LOUDLY!
7. I love to make a difference in someone's life by being a true friend to them.
8. I love my big hands that remind me where I came from; I am a Burke from County Mayo, Tourmakaedy, Ireland. "Paws" like that of my grandfather.
9. I love that I am outspoken and can be counted on to say the tough things when no one else feels able to give them voice.
10. I love that I am a good at the different roles in my life: daughter, mother, friend, sister, niece, cousin, Christian, manager, director, leader, strategist, analyst, etc.

I am not perfect, but I do the best that I can with what I have and where I am in my life. I embrace this moment. This doesn't mean I don't cry over my failures or shortcomings because I do. After the tears are dried and the hurt is out in the open, though, I can move forward. Sometimes, it is just putting one foot in front of the other because that is all I have in me at that time. This is a journey, a process, and I always seem to have just enough light for the step that I am on and that is what matters! Find things to love about yourself and when you get lost or forget why you matter, refer to your reasons to love yourself. You're worth it!!

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